Don't bug me

It is getting harder and harder to write at the moment. Partly I don't know what to say and partly I feel to self-aware to say it. Looking back at last year's entries during month two, I see a similar pattern. Things start to get very internal where language starts to disappear. Or maybe now I feel differently about the whole thing. I don't really want to share things with everyone, just a few people...

So then, what does one write about when you want to share something personal but can't spare the details? Bugs. I can write about bugs.

We have an ant problem in our house. (Is it really a "problem"?) We followed the ants from the grains shelf to a few different possible entry points. My roommate poured muesli over his pancakes only to be disgusted by the multitude of ants crawling in out and around the oat clusters.

Last night on my way out of the bathroom I spied a second cockroach. I couldn't bring myself to kill it. I looked at it, it looked at me. I wonder where the little guy was headed...

I'm covered in mosquito bites from head to toe. Not even the bottom of my middle toe was spared. I now have maybe the shortest practice in the shala--or so it seemed--as I found myself in the women's dressing room all alone with the breeze and the mosquitoes. There I was in shoulderstand variations waving my arms like a mad person at the mosquitoes that buzzed around my head. I read in National Geographic that 1.) mosquitoes know the target they are heading for from an impressive distance 2.) hot, sweaty, lactic acid infused post-vigorous exercise bodies are their favorite victims.

I tell myself that I am going to withdraw my senses, that everything is God, that if I don't acknowledge them they don't exist. But then I hear the buzzing become louder and louder and I can't hold it in any longer so I swat and swat and swat.

PS-Again, yesterday in conference, Sharath emphasized that part of the practice is reading yogic texts. Specifically, he said it was a good idea to start with the Bhagavad Gita.

parampara

"Don't break my back," Sharath laughs. Funny, but not. Everyone knows he has had some back pain problems the last year and I just jumped back and gave him a big kick as he sat helping the person behind me. I'm looking over my shoulder in upward facing dog feeling guilty but also laughing because Sharath is laughing too.

Yesterday in conference--Sharath holds a "conference" every Sunday where he either discusses a topic or he answers students' questions--Sharath spoke about the tradition of parampara in Indian culture in general and ashtanga yoga in particular. Beginning with a story of a teacher/student relationship, he went on to discuss the importance of the transmission of direct knowledge from student to teacher in ashtanga yoga. He spoke about the authorization and certification process and that, really, people who come to Mysore and really are here to do the work, are here to learn the nature of yoga--which is the realization of the self. So, when we aren't practicing, he said to read read read. And if you still have time, volunteer...

He emphasized that we are all here to learn and to practice and that whether you are weak in body or mind or both, with time the practice will help to heal you. In that spirit, he joked about the shala's own "application process", how it's like "oh, nice picture you come". He said that so many people come and really they don't send anyone away no matter what level or state they are in and that he doesn't regret it one bit. His saying this really affected all of us because we all kind of looked inside for a moment and thought about how none of us are perfect and we are all trying our best, but so are the people who we might not think of. Everyone "deserves" to be here, everyone gets a chance. It's funny how he always seems to address in conference whatever people are talking about in the community.

Monsoon

When it rains in Mysore we just don't go anywhere and it's nice because I don't have to worry about being late for anything. Sometimes I pinch myself to see if it is true--if there really isn't anywhere I have to be or anything I have to do. It's interesting how easily I've accepted this new scenario and how I still find myself feeling somewhat surprised just once in a while.

I suppose one could say that a good amount of rain should be expected during monsoon season. However, based on last year, I didn't expect much this time around. I was slightly mistaken. It has been drizzling on and off about every other day. The sky looks more like the skies of Scotland than the technicolor blues in the "Jungle Book" (the Disney version of course). The guide book says that this means clothes that never really dry and emit that moldy strawberry smell, intestinal bugs, mosquito bites, malaria. The make believe "ashtanga almanac" says this means achy joints, sore muscles, slowed digestion, and sleeping all day. I say it means raw chocolate pudding and movies but I'm no expert.

Rooms bathed in melancholic weather, cups of chai, and clouds of incense are good places for contemplation and with all the recent events in the ashtanga community, there seems to be a good bit to think about. Some though bubbles I've seen floating contained:

-Are you here just for the practice or do you expect to get authorized?
-If you're authorized, can you sustain a healthy income just by teaching Mysore?
-Is the authorization/certification process fair?
-Is "the practice" only the asanas and if not, how far does it extend into our everyday dramas?
-When studying in Mysore, where does one's native culture end and India's begin?
-How do we honor a tradition while maintaining our every day lives?

I'm not sure that there are any right or wrong answers to any of these questions but I do think it is a good opportunity to evaluate or own motives, thoughts, and intentions. It is always good to ask "why".

The truth is that this tradition as we know it is still very young in the large scheme of things and we're all still trying to work out what it means.

Sharath hasn't really talked to us students yet about the "changes" to the studying process (6 month minimum between trips), the auth/cert process, or the transfer of content to the ayri website. However, in conference this week, he touched upon the cultural implications of studying in Mysore by emphasizing the importance of the yamas and niyamas.

(From wikipedia)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Raja_Yoga

Yama

Main article: Yamas

Yama consists of five parts: Ahimsa (non-violence), Satya (truthfulness), Asteya (non-stealing), Brahmacharya (celibacy), and Aparigraha (non-covetousness). Ahimsa is perfect harmlessness and positive love also. This removes the brutal nature in man and strengthens the will.

The scientific basis of the Yama instructions may be explained in this way.

The five directives of Yama lay down behavioral norms as prerequisites for elimination of fear and angst and contribute to a tranquil mind. Nonviolence (ahimsa), truthfulness (satyavachana), non-stealing (astheya), child-like behavior (brahmacharya), and moderation in setting goals (aparigraha), prevent situations that evoke fear in human interactions and contribute to peace of mind.

Ahimsa (non-violence) helps to avoid conflicts with fellow human beings that normally occur because of competition for eating and mating. Hurting a person physically or mentally leads to fear of retaliation which disturbs peace of mind.

Satyavachan (truthfulness) helps peace of mind by eliminating fear of discovery of lies. Untruth implies maintaining two versions of an event, possibly in the same set of neurons, thus causing confusion and mental disturbance.

Astheya (non-stealing) eliminates the anxiety of discovery of theft, potential reprisal by the owner and/or punishment by state. Brahmacharya (celibacy or stage of life devoted to seeking knowledge) averts conflict associated with search for mates, eliminates fear of strife, enhances scholarship and upgrades equanimity.

Aparigraha (moderation in setting goals) prevents angst of potential failure, promotes self-control and poise.

Niyama

Main article: Niyama

Niyama is observance of five canons: Shaucha (internal and external purity), Santosha (contentment), Tapas (austerity), Svadhyaya (study of religious books and repetitions of Mantras), and Ishvarapranidhana (self-surrender to God, and His worship).

He who practises meditation without ethical perfection, without the practice of Yama-Niyama cannot obtain the fruits of meditation. Purify your mind first through the practice of Yama-Niyama. Then practice regular meditation. Then you will attain illumination.

Science underslying Niyama can be presented as follows.

Niyama unlike Yama prescribes mental exercises to train the mind to control emotions: (Saucha), (Santosha), (Tapaha), (Svadhyaya) and (Ishwara pranidhanani).

Saucha (Purity of thought) requires active monitoring of the mind from being obsessed with material or corporeal desires.

Santosha (Contentment) prevents desire to obtain, experience and /or accumulate objects of pleasure.

Tapaha (Austere or ascetic life style), by practicing self-denying and austere life style controls fondness for desire-generated emotions.

Svadhyaya (Study about self) enlightens the true nature of human nature and facilitates healthy thoughts.

Ishwara pranidhanani (Surrender of ego to God) makes it easier to be not self-centered by aiming at higher goals.

Thus Niyama instructions prepare the mind to control animal (reptilian brain- generated) and human (cerebral) emotions.